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If my dad taught me anything, it's "never prod a unicorn." close quotes

— submitted by Matt Gibson (gothick) on 20 June 2010 18:22:12 GMT

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There are three certainties in life, death, taxes and hard disk failure. close quotes

(The importance of backups.)

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 31 March 2010 7:26:06 GMT

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I use cat poo as a tiger repellent in our garden. It works perfectly. close quotes

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 14:00:17 GMT

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This website just stole at least half an hour of my life close quotes

(well, it did.)

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 13:57:32 GMT

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Why eat tinned sweetcorn? Cut out the middleman and just throw it straight down the toilet. close quotes

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 13:48:54 GMT

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A good curry always burns twice. close quotes

(Just taking about indian food.)

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 13:46:47 GMT

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It's raining outside, you know - that wet rain. close quotes

(my cousin, Vanessa Bowerman, really referring to 'fine rain', but we took her literally of course.)

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 13:40:00 GMT

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If insanity is close to genius, then I am clearly close to genius. close quotes

(this is one of my very own. You work it out.)

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 13:38:21 GMT

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Why is a mouse when it spins? close quotes

(My favourite nonsense sentence. Used to check if anyone is actually listening.)

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 13:36:00 GMT

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I'm fine thanks, just a bit sore after a rather active weekend. close quotes

(a colleague (Ben Gane) was heard to utter these words in response to being asked how he was on the telephone. Apparently, he was referring to having played in a hockey match. Yeah right.)

— submitted by Simon Taylor (Phooto) on 30 March 2010 13:35:09 GMT

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Showing sentences 1 to 10 of 145 total

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